By Samuel Patrick Smith
The following routine is for Selina Frederick's WING IT! produced by SPS Magic.
Begin with the Farm House folder in your hands and the cut-out rooster loaded in the back. The farm animal cards are in a stack ready to pick up and display.
How many of you like to eat breakfast? They say it's the most important meal of the day. This morning while I was having breakfast at a restaurant, I called the waitress over. I said, "I'm sorry. I don't want to cause a problem, but this coffee tastes like mud!"
She said, "The coffee tastes like mud? It should! It was GROUND this morning!"
Well, this is a story about breakfast, or rather about some farm animals who MISSED breakfast because the farmer overslept and didn't get up to feed them. You can see those hungry animals looking in at the farmer sound asleep in bed, wondering who was going to wake him up.
[Close the folder and place it aside. Now pick up the animal cards with the barnboard side toward the audience so they can't yet see the animal pictures.]
Let's take a closer look those hungry animals. They were so hungry, they could have eaten a cow. And speaking of cows...[turn the stack of cards around so the cow is showing]...she was the most outspoken one of all. She said, "We're going to get breakfast one way or udder!"
Then the other animals asked if she would be willing to go wake up the farmer. She said, "Well, now, I DO want breakfast; I just don't want to have a steak in it."
[Place the cow to the back of the stack, now revealing the lamb. Do this as you get to each animal in the story.]
So they asked if lamb if she would wake up the farmer. 'Noooooooooo,' she said. [Say this with a baaaa-ing tone of voice.]
Now even though it was still morning, the pig said he was too hot to walk over and wake up the farmer. 'I'm so hot,' he said, 'I'm nearly bacon!'
'Yes,' said the other animals. 'I'll bet you never sausage heat!'
The dog came over and said, "I'm just itching for food. I want breakfast!' The good-mannered cow said, 'What do you say?'
The dog said, 'Fleas!' [Said as "please," with a pleading tone.]
With a joke like that, I'd better duck. [Reveal duck card.] If you said to this duck, 'Quack!' do you know what she would say to you? 'Quack, quack, quack, , quack, quack!"...because you may be a quick quacker, but the duck is a quicker quacker backer.
So none of the animals wanted to wake up the farmer, and they tried to figure out who could do it. Who wakes up early and makes a lot of noise? [Put the duck card in the back of the stack, revealing the rooster card. The kids will say, 'The rooster!']
The rooster! That's right! All of the animals thought it would be a great idea if the rooster went back around to the farm house and woke up the farmer. They said, 'Let's ask the rooster if he would do us a good turn [turn over the rooster card] and go wake up the farmer?' But when they looked for him, the rooster was gone.
He was not only an early riser and a good noisemaker, he was fast! In the blink of an eye, he was at the farm house telling the farmer it was time to get up and feed the stock. [Pick up the Farm House folder, open it, but no rooster is to be seen. Close the folder.] Now that's strange! I thought that's how the story went. The rooster is supposed to be around here somewhere. [Let the rooster pop out from the back of the folder, from one side, then the other and up over the top while the children shout, point, and scream. All the while, you pretend not to see him. Finally, when the kids have depleted their oxygen supply, you see the rooster.]
And there he is—the ROOSTER! He did wake up the farmer who fed all of the animals right away. They all ate breakfast and lived happily ever after—or at least until lunch. And after that day, the farmer never forgot one very important piece of advice which the rooster passed along to him:
Early to bed
Early to rise
And you'll never have red
In the whites of your eyes!